Taking a risk

I've always been a sensible person, tried to do the right thing, planned ahead, made sure I had an emergency plan for back-up. Well, I don't know what's gotten into me but I've decided to for once in my life leap of the edge. I'm referring to my post from a few days ago... And what I mean mostly is: I have quit my job. There's only two days ago and next Monday - for the first time in my life - I will officially be unemployed.

Am I scared? Getting there. Am I starting to panic? Slowly. Do I feel relieved? A lot. I know with my visa and all that it is a big risk. But I just couldn't commit to something I knew wasn't going to make me happy. And I have been unhappy for too long. I only live once and I want to enjoy my life, make the most of it while I can. And continuing working where I am just to get my visa and stay in the country? It's not worth it if staying meant that I wasn't able to actually live my life, be happy and spend time with the people I love.

So what am I going to do? Right now I'm above all looking forward to having some time off and going on another little holiday. Matt and I have planned a camping trip between Xmas and New Year's. I'm really excited as he's going to show me where he grew up and I might even meet more of his family.

As for immigration... I will do as I was advised by the officer on the phone and apply for a new visa. I'm starting to get some paperwork together and there are a few people I need to talk to. My friend Sandra from Germany was a big help in this. She's been living in New Zealand for a few years now and just got her residency *yay* She's all safe... I first met her in June when Dan and I went up north for a weekend trip. We haven't known each other for long but she's been a dear friend of mine especially when I was going through a rough time after the break-up.

Anyway.. I went to see Sandra and her boyfriend last weekend just before their 4-week-trip to Germany. She's dealt with immigration so many times now and gave me heaps of advice and an actual "To-Do-List" :-) Typical German efficiency... but I've been feeling a lot better since talking to her and know that all is not lost. Nothing that really matters will come easy in life so I will keep on fighting for what I believe in.

Matt has also been a big help just by being there and supporting me, tolerating my moods and lending me his ear. The longer I know him the more I feel that he is my soulmate, the part of me that's always been missing. I know I am hopelessly romantic. But if you don't believe you've already lost. Haven't you?

Jobwise I had to learn that things in New Zealand are a looooooot slower than in Germany. I've sent about 8 applications in the last 4 four weeks - and have only heard back from 2. Unsuccessful :-( But I'm invited to an interview with the one job that I really really want. Unfortunately the lady and I keep missing each other on the phone so we still haven't found a date... but I'm getting there. Haste makes waste. Gut Ding will Weile haben...


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